weddingsv make me drug and hornr
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
I'm bleeding and have questions
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
Randomize
