ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
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