You were right, I'm so drunk and I want to eat the shit out of my vanilla cupcake candle it smells delish
Experience is the best teacher
What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
Headphones came off my phone same time as The Weeknd sang "Who's gonna fuck you like me?"...Everyone at work heard it.
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
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