Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
Times have changed. Freshman year I could throw my shirt in a bonfire and still get laid. Now when I puke in my girlfriend's bed on her birthday I'm "an asshole"
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
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