You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
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