We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
Randomize
