I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Randomize
