Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
I'm texring you during a blow job. She thinks I'm looking shit up. Fml. Ftw.
forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just woke up face down in my kitchen covered in cheetos. my mom just stepped over me to get to the coffee maker. hello summer
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
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