Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
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