I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
Randomize
