Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
Randomize