What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
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