Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
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