worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
Bring me that man meat
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
Hey this is your roommate. You know the one that let you have sex with her while you called out your exs name and cried?
I have no recollection of that. You must have the wrong number. P.s. your thongs still on the ceiling fan.
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
You know you're getting old when you pick up hot sorority girls at the bar, and they write down their phone number, and under it 'we're great babysitters!'
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
Randomize
