in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
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