Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
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