Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
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