i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
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