please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
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