He felt like a one man threesome
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
Randomize
