I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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