Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
you texted me last night and told me you couldn't find the toilet.
That explains the puddle of pee in my closet.
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
Randomize
