I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
