I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
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