Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Randomize
