so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
Randomize
