she was so not down for the gang bang
I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
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