your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
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