yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
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