Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
Randomize