I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
Randomize
