I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
We are two peas in an std pod
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
Randomize
