dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
Randomize