I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
Randomize