There is a strange man mowing my lawn. Best day ever.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
Let's paint friendship bongs
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
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