i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
Randomize
