She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
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