i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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