His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
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