K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
i like how i just referred to his pregnant wife as the "other" melissa and you didn't even judge me.
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
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