Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She guessed my name 9 times, and 5 of those times she guessed Mike. Figured that'd be an easy target for the night.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
We don't watch enough power rangers
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
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