UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
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