Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
Randomize
