Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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