yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
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