Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
so you had a one ended conversation with the toilet las night in between barfs. you kept telling the toilet how strong it was because its gone through a lot of shit in its life.
drunk me is so punny.
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
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