just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Randomize
