I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
How did you make it to work sans hangover?
4 words: Clif Bar soaked in tequila. Just like albert pujols
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
