don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
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I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
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ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
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