I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
It was the classiest, most strategic and inspired vomiting I've ever witnessed. Like a blind mans first sunrise. A priests first prayer. Or a virgins first orgasm.
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Randomize
